Morty's 25 (plus 5) Random Things About Me

I have recently become a fan of (and subsequently obsessed with) Facebook.
WARNING!
If you are not a member yet, take heed.
IT IS ADDICTING!
A substantial portion of my High School graduating class are all there, and now they are my friends. Most of them barely recognized my existence back then, but hey; that's ancient history. The reason I bring this to light now comes as a result of a note I received from an old pen-pal (see the July 2008 posting titled "AWRY Pronounced "Orrie"?) "25 Random Things About Me" is a great way to get to know a little more about those you have now come to consider as friends within the Facebook universe. I found that it was a tall order to come up with 25 random facts pertaining to myself. After careful consideration, I have also come to the conclusion that I may have eliminated a small number of tidbits that I would have liked to include. In keeping with my recently realized license to be lazy (see the previous posting for information on that) I have decided to post my facebook facts here along with some additional thoughts as well.
In the music world these would be construed as Bonus Tracks.

Morty's 25 Random Things About Me.

1. I despise the apartment we currently call home. It is far too small for three of us, but due to the current economic climate (and some pretty foolish financial decisions) we are trapped there.

2. I have always been more of a follower, never a leader

3. I am absloutely convinced that it is not what you know, It's WHO you know.

4. I am a huge fan of the Partridge Family, own all of their CD's and know the lyrics to no less than 95% of their tunes

5. I don't like award shows and have little interest in most films that receive the "Oscar Buzz."

6. I have always been a morning person.

7. I have abominable handwriting and can no longer write in script.

8. I have little interest in anything political, and believe that most of our chosen leaders care only for themselves.

9. One of my favorite movies of all time is "The Gumball Rally."

10. I can totally live without my cell phone.

11. I love country music.

12. I am petrified of the doctor.

13. I would love to lose thirty pounds

14. My favorite place in the world is Key West

15. I would love to write a novel

16. I never stop worrying about the inevitable days ahead when my son will no longer look up to me.

17. I always wanted rock and roll hair, or a cool pony tail.

18. I avoid confrontation.

19. I often wish there really was a "Fantasy Island".

20. I would like to try horseback riding one day.

21. I love the sound of seagulls at the beach.

22. I have little use for religion after being told by an over-zealous, misguided relative that "Harry Potter" was killing my child.

23. I love to walk.

24. I am a Beach Boys fanatic

25. I still LOVE White Castle.

Bonus Tracks (Facts)

26. I have never owned a real suit

27. I concur with my wife and can go for an Extreme Makeover

28. I will never be a fan of Howard Stern

29. I used to love Roller Coasters and insane thrill rides. Now I feel I have gotten too old for that type of rush. (There is no way that going from 0 to 120 in less than a few seconds can be good for you).

30. I have little interest in and no use whatsoever for The Beatles.

There it is, Morty in a nutshell and another posting in for January. Please feel free to comment and don't forget to check in at unknown80s.blogspot.com with a new posting only days away. Now get yourself on Facebook if you haven't done so already.

More friends, more friends...

2009 The Year in "Pre"view

4 lines from a lazy poet, her epitaph read , only after loudly voicing her annoyance at being approached by yet another autograph seeker. Granted, she was the most popular girl in school, but we were in the sixth grade! I had hoped for nothing more than a brief memento of the even briefer time we had spent together over the last several years, something I could go back to and read with a combination of melancholy and affection.

4 lines from a lazy poet, written haphazardly underneath four hastily drawn horizontal lines on a purple page in an album, loosely considered to be our yearbook.

"In days of old when knights were bold and toilets weren't invented..."

I don't remember the rest, but that one sure made for a memorable piece of whimsy which still makes me laugh. More than one of my classmates had graced my pages with that fine display of literature, Plagiarism alive and well amongst our graduating class.

Moving up, I have to remind myself. We merely Moved Up from Grade School.

4 lines from a lazy poet, followed by her signature. I won't identify her by name (Sue) because that would be unfair, yet what a disappointment coming from not only the most popular girl in class, but from the valedictorian as well.

"Another one," she complained, her arms thrust towards the ceiling. "Everyone loves me, I know."

This is not a story about love lost, or first heartbreak.

Remarkably, I realize now that her brief uncaring brush-off is actually a golden ticket of sorts. It has taken me more than three decades to realize and appreciate the gift that she had entrusted to the mere hands of one of her many sixth grade subordinates.

A License to be lazy!

Now that I am aware of what is in my possession, I am unsure of just how to go about using it. While I am not exactly going to the gym these days, laziness is almost a foreign concept to me. Trying to maintain two blog sites, write a column for a local magazine, working far too many hours at a job I actually get paid to do, and balancing family responsibilities is no easy task. 2008 proved a great writing year for me, and it is my hope that 2009 might follow in the same vein. There are still many tales to tell as I continue this journey through my life via the world of blogging. Unfortunately, I have not felt the calling of late to sit in front of the computer and begin the task of relaying them. It is, however with this in mind, that I have decided to put to use my thirty-four year old license to be lazy.

Think about it.

Recording artists, in the guise of releasing Greatest Hits collections are actually doing what?

Being Lazy!

As my December deadline at Forest Hills Celebrity & Entertainment approached, I had almost considered following in the footsteps of so many of the aforementioned musicians and submitting a greatest hits collection of my own.

The Best of Morty 2008.

I had it all figured out too. I would preface these brief synopses of some of my writings by welcoming all new readers and allowing them a glimpse into the past (back issues, I think they call it in the biz).

I know what you're thinking.

It's brilliant!

Common sense and my fine work ethic prevailed however, moving that idea to the proverbial back burner. Instead, I put my writing to good use that issue, drawing attention to a small group of car enthusiasts who spend their time raising money for a local children's hospital. It proved both enlightening and heartwarming, adding an entirely new dimension to my holiday season.

As I now feel pressed for time, not having posted in nearly a month, I have decided that in the interest of getting something online, I would take a semi-lazy path and provide you, the reader, with a preview of what is to come in 2009.

When I launched this site in December of '06, it began with a tale of my adolescent life, first love and its corresponding first kiss. Remarkably, through lots of shameless self-promotion, that memoir not only reached its intended target audience, but so touched some of those involved that a book project is now getting underway. Only in its infant stages as I write this, it is our combined hope to publish something by year's end. "Return to Innocence," marked my return to the written word following over two decades of literary silence. It also landed me the official title of columnist (which I can't mention enough) in the aforementioned periodical. As I attempt to find time to work towards publishing a historical account of the location in which Innocence had taken place, I plan to revisit that first posting. Having grown far more comfortable with the entire writing process, I cringe now whenever I take a gander back at my blogging debut. The impending result will be an extreme makeover, hopefully with a somewhat more appealing title.

My second posting; Odd Jobs: A Resume' for Disaster (wow, I'm good with titles) loosely hinted at my long and varied work history in a number of different occupational areas. Wait until you hear of my brief stint as a perfume salesman ripping off the unsuspecting public with knock-offs. SUCCESSFULLY!

While nothing may seem more ridiculous than delivering false teeth, at least that position was reputable.

(I am hoping I may have piqued your curiosity enough to take a trip back through the archives for a better understanding of what I am talking about). While you're back there, take a look at "Tales from the VW," a hysterical romp outlining my earliest driving experiences. There are still plenty of tales untold from that Smokey and the Bandit, Dukes of Hazzard era if you catch my drift.

Recently my son explained to me what a bad, disgusting friend the vacuum cleaner is.

Hey, he's only five.

I argued with him.

Mr. Hoover, my mom's late 70's upright model became a very close friend of mine one summer 1981 night, an early drinking tale that will either have you grabbing your sides to hold in the explosion of laughter, or find you shaking your head in disgust or dismay.

Recently, Justin sat upon my lap in front of the computer, proudly showing me a few scribbled notes on a post-it.

"What's that," I asked.

"It says blogged by Justin. I wrote people about the 1980's"

For now, I will keep his blog out of the spotlight. Five years of age is too soon for the public airing of his dirty laundry.

Mine on the other hand...?

Music, love, laughter, tears (maybe tears).
It's all coming your way in 2009.